There were certainly some top-shelf toys over the years. But while Star Wars toys and Rubik's Cubes are the ones that'll be in the Smithsonian or buried in time capsules, there were a ton of well-loved toys that may have been the second stringers, but were awesome nonetheless.
Best of all -- the toy makers used revolt and disgust as their muses.
And for some reason -- no matter how gross they were -- moms actually allowed them. In fact, you could see moms in the commercials seemingly endorsing them.
While little Billy made his own concoction with the Vomitorium, mom would usually come in his room and make that "Oh, Billy..." look while she rolled her eyes, put his dirty clothes in a basket, and then walked out.
Disgusting toys seemed to hit their peak in the 1980s, but they are timeless in their appeal. Just like these five ...
No. 5: Madballs
Madballs were soft, squishy foam rubber balls that were sculpted to look like monster heads. But they weren't just any monster heads. They may have eye patches, scars, bandages, seeping pus -- you name it.
They sported names like "Foul Shot," which was a basketball with worms crawling out of its head and eye sockets; "Oculus Orbis," which was an eyeball; and "Slobulus," which was a drooling monster with its eye hanging out.
One of the balls was a head with an exposed brain named "Crack Head." The manufacturer later changed its name to "Bash Brain", because they didn't want there to be some connection between cocaine enthusiast crack heads and Madballs.
Madballs reached such popularity that they even spawned video games and a cartoon. In fact, there's even a Madballs game for your iPod.
No. 4: Mad Scientist Monster Lab
Kids today are really missing out. Sure, they have their PS3s and iPods, but that really teaches them nothing about torture. In the 1980s, we had an awesome toy called "The Mad Scientist Monster Lab."
It's basic function was to let the budding mad scientist learn the basics of hurting things.
In the box was a little tank that you filled with "Powdered Monster Flesh Remover." Then you'd mix it with the "Secret Froth Formula" to make a truly B-movie-esque acid bath. Next, using plastic bones, you'd create your monster's skeleton and then apply "Monster Flesh Compound" around the skeleton.
When you creation was complete, just give him a bath in the acid and it would strip the flesh right off his skeleton.
This was a great toy and probably gave budding serial killers something to do without torturing small animals.
No. 3: Queasy Bake Cookerator Oven
Once your creative juices were flowing making and torturing your own monsters, a snack would really take the edge off.
Everyone's sister owned an Easy Bake Oven -- and they were surprisingly useful -- if you were into making tiny little cakes with a light bulb.
But boys had a problem -- they weren't manful enough.
Years later, Hasbro retooled the venerable Easy Bake Oven to make it more boy friendly. They took off all the girly pink plastic and replaced it with blood and an illuminated scary face.
In the set were ingredients to make worms, bugs, and brains. So, while your sister was making a little chocolate cake with delightful chiffon frosting, you could make a stack of worms, served with a bleeding brain.