First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes separate honeymoons?

By Dawn Jorgenson - Graham Media Group
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There’s certainly something to be said for keeping some independence when you’re married, but some couples are taking it to the extreme by going on separate honeymoons.

Solomoons, or unimoons, as some are calling them, appear to be gaining traction among some newlyweds.

Why, you might ask? According to the New York Times, it’s often because the bride and groom can’t compromise on a vacation, or because work is taking precedence over the couple’s romance, so they plan their honeymoon separately.

As with everything, because people seem to have feelings about it, there are two sides of this argument.

A sociologist and online dating expert based in Los Angeles told the New York Times that the idea of separate honeymoons may signal the continued evolution of marriage.

“Given the recognition that, for most couples today, marriage and partnership is considered all-consuming, with the partner needing to fulfill every role — physical, spiritual, emotional and sexual — perhaps separate vacations is a recognition among some couples that all expectations cannot be met by a single person.”

But in general, there are a lot of people who seem to agree that unimoons are either silly or just outright a big mistake.

Helen Fisher, who conducts research on relationships at the Kinsey Institute, agrees with this sentiment.

She said while vacationing together, couples can trigger all three brain systems: Feelings of deep attachment, sex drive and romantic love — which collectively stimulates the dopamine system and oxytocin levels.

“Perhaps I’m old-fashioned, but I think it should be marked,” Fisher said. “You are at a new stage in your life when you marry, and you are missing out on triggering the three most valuable brain systems for a lasting relationship.”

We're curious if these solo honeymoons could actually become a trending thing.

 

Graham Media Group 2019