DETROIT - Note to readers: This is supposed to be a joke. Don't fill potholes with random objects.
It's Michigan pothole season and since, at least in some cases, residents are beating crews to filling potholes, we'd like to give out some Michigan-themed suggestions.
Besides potholes, Michigan is known for many things, like pizza, beer and our Great Lakes.
Here are 8 Michigan inspired items to fill your potholes:
Cans of Vernors
This may not fill the pothole entirely, but it will help settle your upset stomach after getting that flat tire. James Vernor would be proud.
This Detroit-area snack item could be the key to pothole filling success! With all of the salt on those cashews, any additional snow will melt on contact. It's almost too good to be true. We'd suggest the family size, especially in Wayne County.
Turning the pothole into a pie may be a pie-in-the-sky idea, but if you think about it, for a long, long time, it may just be the greatest idea ever. It's easy to make and will have your pothole smelling like grandma's apple pie, just without the windowsill and edible nature.
This is probably the more expensive option, but who are we to judge? Shinola watches are fantastic items and we wouldn't ever suggest throwing them into a pothole, but again, who are we to judge?
Michigan is becoming a global beer destination - and for good reason. With great breweries popping up all over the state, it's hard to overlook the beer-pothole potential. Be sure to pick the beer you don't enjoy, like for instance, Soft Parade, or spoil the pothole with your favorite brews. Who knows - maybe the pothole is a beer snob - did you even bother to ask?!
Jet's 8-Corner Pizza
This may seem specific, but if you've ever had the 8-Corner at Jet's, you know exactly why this would work. The hefty and sturdy dose of crust heaven with an inanely high amount of cheese will stop that pothole in its tracks. The pothole will be almost as cheesy as this list is!
It's the Motor City after all - we must have extra car parts laying around! Give that old set of tires a new life as pothole filler. Offer that broken radiator one last purpose. It's probably part of the circle of life anyway - you hit a pothole, damage your car - and then throw those damaged parts back into the pothole. Life is a beautiful thing.
Anything From Meijer
Meijer has everything - which makes it the perfect solution to Michigan's pothole problem. Grab a set of socks, a new set of forks and a frozen pizza - and let's get to work. You can fill these potholes with pretty much anything from Meijer. It all works. Founded in 1934, it's almost as if the Meijer brothers considered potholes when creating their supercenter store model.
Well, there you have it. Michigan is as good at having things to fill potholes as it is at creating potholes. It's a match made in heaven. What would you use to fill potholes? Let us know in the comments below or on our Facebook page.
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