I have two boys, ages 9 and 4. In 2020, my wife and I found out we were expecting a baby and to our excitement and surprise it was going to be a girl this time.
I was scared and nervous. Heck, I even wrote a song about it.
We welcomed Chloe Marie Cassimy into our family on March 8, 2021. It was an incredible feeling. Her first word was “Da-Da” which made me so happy. At almost 10 months now, she crawls all over the house and even tries to climb up the stairs. She has four teeth and loves drinking carbonated water. Can you say bougie baby?
What I wasn’t prepared for is that there’s a total difference in the type of toys a girl likes, or at least my baby girl. We have monster cars, hot wheels, basketballs and other sporting equipment for the boys. It was funny watching her play with all of those things now that she’s almost 10 months old. It didn’t occur to me that she would also love things like dolls and things that are soft and fuzzy, etc. Trust me, she still loves to push a ball around the house!
Also, nobody taught me how to do a girl’s HAIR. Umm hello?! Of course, we put bows in her hair, etc. etc. But now it’s at the point where you’ve got to still do SOMETHING with her hair. I can’t say I know how to braid. I can barely make a ponytail. (Hopefully you saw the ponytail fail on my Instagram) Thankfully I married a woman who graduated from cosmetology school so I’m covered, most of the time.
There’s also the difference in my level of care for my daughter versus my sons. I’m not afraid to admit it -- I wouldn’t ever want my sons to get hurt -- but there somehow seems to be more of a fragility when it comes to my daughter. Thankfully she hasn’t gotten hurt much because I refuse to put her down. Ha! But do you know what I mean? There’s the underlying stereotype that boys are tough but girls are soft and pink. Whether that’s true or not I’ve found I want to protect her from being hurt, physically and emotionally, more than the boys. Is that wrong?
I guess you can describe it as a different kind of love. I’m learning more about different kinds of love myself with each child no matter their gender. The more kids you have (we are DONE trust me, I think?) the more you find out how much love you’re capable of giving.
What things have you learned becoming a #GirlDad and what advice do you have for me as my daughter gets older?